goodbye 2017 / hello 2018 :)

So, I haven't really taken the time to figure out if I've become more cognizant of the world's craziness, or if the world is indeed, crazier as we close 2017.  But I do know this, for as long as I am able, for as long as tiny chumley, my big boyfriend, and I are able, we will work to keep our little cyber world as safe and merry and loving as ever.  A place where a happy go lucky little short legged wolf can be best friends with a tattered one wing falcon, where there are happy disco parties every friday, and where poopie snakes and gummy worms are the currency of fun. I honestly have no idea what 2018 will bring for our tiny family or the real world, but I'm ever so glad you're along for the ride. Happy New Year, friends!! :)

the makey list

wait, what do u mean u cannot make inflatable poopie snakes, mom? we agreed before that me and duk duk are in charge of the makey ideas and this is our list. if it's on the list, it's on the list.

and inflatable poopie snakes are definitely on the list. :)

the dark wolf raises (a stink)

hee hee, like a hawk in search of prey, the dark wolf surveys his land while he waits for his handlers to finish readying themselves for a nice winter walkie...

how many people would he frighten on his walkie? , the dark wolf wondered. and not by any particular effort on his part, but just by merely being the ferocious something that they were seeing.


as he watched the girl handler approach him and open the door, his hackles bristled under the puffy cape santa had given him, in subtle acknowledgement thst his second handler was talking at him from be-

what? ugh. dad!! a dark elf?? sheesh, i toldjoo already the dark wolf is not, i repeat not any kind of elf. the dark wolf is the primary protector/collector of poops of all shapes and sizes and he fights inpoopstice against the downtrodden. not an elf. repeat, not an elf. nope. nopies. nope. just because his head gets cold and this was the only hat he could fi- nope. nopies. daaaad.

mom, can u please tell dad if he cannot kindly refrain from bothering the dark wolf during our walkies then he will be asked to remain at home for said duration of our walkie?

rawwwrry christmas my friends! :)

dear diary,
today i am busy spending time with my family but i thought i would share a peek at some of the things we got for christmas and a picture that is pretty representative of what our christmas morning was like. because, well, u know, ima wolf. anyhow i hope u have a merry rest of today :) :)

the santa plan :)

um, well mom, no reason, really. but if u happen 2 find any presents from santa for a nellie mc smelly, can u please let me and duk duk know? :)

baxter and duk duk's infinite christmas playlist

okay, that one..o, maybe a million times. no wait, a million and one times.

hee hee, what's that, duk duk? oh yes, by apples in stereo. i will look that one up next.

oh no, not again! seriously why bother even making an app for something that may as well be easier and more reliable if u trained a monkey to do it using punch cards and an abacus.

now we have 2 start all over again.

boy, i sure hope santa appreciates how busy we been spending all this time trying to stay good. how many days is it til christmas again??

orNOmentally speaking

hee, hee, well, mom, technically i did hang our new ornament :)

spa day

hee hee, do not tell mom but u know, i think she was right.  these slippers are so cozy and perfect for lounging around after a long day's pedaling to and from school.  and putting mom's face cream on my paws beforehand? pure genius! already i can tell my pads will be smoother than a baby's blankie. what's that? oh yeah, we totally need amend our christmas list and ask santa for two jars of that gooey stuff. one for us and one 2 re-replace the nilly frosting we substituted in mom's jar so she would worry about what hap-

oh, why, hello mom. u look lovely and hydrated today. wait, what was that? oh.  nopies we have not been in your bathroom at all today. in fact, we have just been sitting here being good for goodness sake really. why do u ask? :)

ez pz

hee hee, really? o i can do that, mom, ezpz.

hthee?

today i am eleven :)

hee hee hee, ooOOOooooOooo! i smell blueberries and i smell strawberries and i smell carrots and i smell chicken and i smell duc- i mean, i smell watermelon..mom may i please open my eyes now?

oooOOOOOoooOOOOoooooOOOoo! it is even taller and deliciouser looking then i ever imagined! :)

layer cake

....and make it a mile high, so when we put the two ones on top, it will look like a really really long poopie snake! o, and i get to lick the spoon, right, mom? :) :)

little red riding wolf :)

rawwwr! rawwwr! rawwr!

rawww-

hee hee, why hello, mother. um,
guess what - i found the red sweater u have been looking for. :)

hypopetically speaking :)

well...i kind of see your point about the work and all, mom, but...well...

if santa brought us a manatee, we could name him hugh and it would totally be worth it, dontchoo think? :)

o christmas glee

hee hee, okay mom, turn it on..

ooOoooOOOOoOooooooOooo!

thanks, mom! this is exactly what we wanted. now we just need to put a red ballie on top and it can dry while we are at school. and then, when we get home, we will make our masterpoop video and then we can post it this evening and everything! :)

wolfy wolferstein, PgMP®

hee hee, yes please, mom, i would like to see...o snap. i guess u do still have a lot of finish work to do, mom. when me and duk duk were developing our doot schedule, i guess we were only thinking about the number of sets we wanted u to make and not the number of individual items u would have to spend time on.

and i see how pretty they are and we certainly would not want to rush u..

okeky dokey, i agree. let's move the doot date for our ornaments from monday 12/4 to saturday 12/9 at nine pm est and i will tell duk duk so we can update the first video we made and post it to instygram and facebooky.

u know, this schedule change works out really well really because it hopefully gives me and duk duk more time so we can make a second ornament video. because the first one was meant to be a teaser . u know, kind of like so when people see it, they would be like, ooooOOOOoooooooOOOooo - did u see that? i think i saw the legs move and i know i saw the tail move and i wonder what the rest of it looks like and haw haw haw didjoo see the size of the poopie plop it made??

(pfweeeOoooOoop!) um, mom, u are still wearing your gas mask, arentchoo? :)

when everything is last minute but cyber brown wednesday is still today at noon and nine pm est :)

hee hee, well mom, we kind of want them to have kind of that gumball machine prize feeling, only they would be for grown ups. so, better made, obviously, and, well maybe, not like, just some random solid primary colors, but something with a lot of depth and visual texture and contrast. and, well, it still has to be in keeping with the spirit of cyber brown wednesday, so be sure to not make it so sophisticated that nobuddy would recognize we had a paw and wing in developing it. like, we were stinking it should be offered as a special cyber brown trio, that u can stack. and maybe one of the could be glinty sparkly like our glitter poops - maybe that should be the brown one. and one can be like, visually soft yet light reflective and interesting, like u know those quartzy stones we saw at the gem show with the golden lines in it? o, i have an idea for that which i am totallu prepared to sacrifice for but lets get back to that in a second. oh, and so the last one could be like, kind of muted colorful pearly pretty, but, maybe like, make it look like my guts the way it looked when the special tushie man took an xray of me. u know, kind of gas bubbly but not mister bubbles bubbly? more like organs and stuff, but not so defined that its all gray's anatomy gross. and, well, that's about it really. o, and can u make like eleventy million of them or at least maybe six sets in each of the mold sizes we got u? that way we can split them among our double doots happening at noon and nine pm est.

oh and can u hurry up and give us set for us to photograph now so we can work on our marketing pictures? i mean, i know we are also offering a few special teeny weenie xmas tree pee blocks and we just released the second edition of our teeny tiny story book the poop pn the stoop, but i really think our cyberbrown wednesday event today will not be the same without them, dontchoo? :)

black friday :)

do not worry, mom, we have it all figured out. here, let us show u. duk duk, u know what to do - wolf and falcon assemble!

hee hee hee - hey hey - no pokesies back there, duk duk, unless u wanna unleash the olfactory equivalent of poopnarok... again. hee hee, i know! i wonder what mon puts in the turkey brine. or maybe it was the sausage stuffing. and the sweet potatoes. all that fiber. its pretty much nature's gunpowder really, hee hee hee. what? oh, ok okay.

see mom? snug as a smooshed poopie snake in sneaker treads. no way we will get separated. now will u take us to the wally world so we can buy an eleventy hundred inch led ultra high def 4k hd tv for the heat cave?

(ps - do not forget about our own little cyber brown wednesday event! we have been busy behind the scenes with a very special makey for it. oh and we are not sure exactly when we will be dooting yet but maybe probably in the evening and hopefully that gives us time to preview a few things in either or monday or wednesday morningblog posty :) )

be kind rewind

hee hee, okay, okay, duk duk. just give me a couple more minutes with this fresh hot pile of laundry and then i can help u with the thanksgiving centerpiece for our table.

what? no, those are my gummy worms fair and square. it's not my fault u stink at playing monkey chow mambo chugalug chewdown. i mean, seriously, i feel like i am so full of monkey chow gas bubbles right now that the only thing keeping me from literally exploding is...hmmmmmm. well, nothing real-

(pfweeeeeOoOoOoOoooooOooot!)

-ly. hee hee hee. foo-whee! um, mom, i think we might have to hit the rewind button on this load of laundry if u know what i mean :)

baxter & duk duk's special friday matinee feature: weenie reindeer games :)

dear diary,
next week is thanksgiving week and as might imagine we will be very busy being thankful and eating and entertaining family and stuff so please do not worry if we are not posting regularly or responding very quickly. also, i am stilll washing cooties off myself from cassie's relatively brief but incredibly stinky visit, so there is that. but anyhow, even though we might still be posting a little next week, me and duk duk thought it might be nice to leave u with an officially awesome video we just made which we are sure u will want to watch with the sound on over and over again during next week's comedy drought. plus it has a very special announcement at the end. 

oh and if u were wondering, we hope to have a few goodies for cyber brown wednesday but we may not have a lot of time to preannounce what it will be so stay tuned because there will probably be ninjadoots! okay, me and duk duk need to pick up lil pink puppy and lulu the tiger from chukky poops so i will write u later and i hope u have a very good weekend. :)

toodleydoo!
b.

teeny weenie csi

no, mom, i do not know how it got this way at all..

and i do see how u might think that these are ferocious chomp marks. but as u know, there are many tools here that could easily make those marks. and u know that i know u know i know u know i know better, so that pretty much rules me out, dontchoo think?

and besides, even if a wolf really did have anything to do with it, i am sure he would be very very sorry. :)