Wednesday, May 27, 2020

bait


...and if u like that carrot, mister bunny, we have plenty more inside for u to eat. and u can bring your other  delicious i mean ferocious bunny friends, too. :) 




Friday, May 22, 2020

first harvest :)


well, this is really cool and all, mom, but maybe next year can we please grow some rainbow gummy sugar snaps too? :)




Wednesday, May 20, 2020

mission impoopable


..no, go left. now right. up. up. left two steps..now spin until u feel dizzy and stop... okay, now going in a counterclockwise pattern, crouch down and pick up the third stone u feel that is shaped like a chicken egg, spit on it and then throw it...now skippy walk seven, no eight steps ahead....okay, poop a snickers and two level three swirly cinnabons, pick them up to sculpt a- what? mom, u have to take this seriously.  it’s not my fault i cannot go purchase them myself because u have not made me my mask yet and ipso facto it is definitely not my fault that me and duk duk’s gummy worm supply is so low that we now have to crack into our super secret, super secure zombie proof zombie apocalypse stash... and, it is totally, definitely, not my fault that u and dad have not been working on your poop shapes as diligently as me and duk duk have because as u now can see being able to poop complex shapes is very useful even in non-zombie apocalyptic times.  so, can u please work with me here? :) 





Monday, May 18, 2020

technically really :)


hee hee, ooo i smell bunnies! i am sure mom will not mind if i- 




o, smello, mom. u r looking lovely, even despite the heat and all the yard work and all. 
o what was that? what am i doing? o nothing really. i mean, i am totally staying inside and taking it easy, just like i promised. see? all my toesies inside just right here at the doorway. 






hee hee, and even now, technically really. but, um, while u r here, can u take me out back so i can hunt ra- i mean poopies? 







Wednesday, May 13, 2020

blankie turtlepotamus


well, i am pretty sure a blankie turtlepotamus eats carrots and bananas and gummy worms, so, maybe we could start with that? i mean as a snackie, because blankie turtlepotami eat, o, five meals a day.  plus he gets snackies for his best friend, blankie falconoceros. :) 




Monday, May 11, 2020

jjust another wolf mother’s day sunday





see? i toldjoo, mom. faster than a rolling poopie snake. and at least eleventy times more ferocious. hee hee, now can me and duk give u what we made u for mother’s day bc u probably want to open it outside so the flies can enjoy it too :) 





Friday, May 8, 2020

world record


pee-eew! these purple flowers are so stinky! okay, thank u for doing this, mom, r u ready? on three....one..



two....



threeeEEEEeeeee!



(ooof) 



hee hee hee, didjoo get it? that must have been at least eleventy feet!! can i see the picture?duk duk is going 2 b so jelly.  :)





Wednesday, May 6, 2020

bruthy bruth :)


hee hee, hi hthed, huh bruthy huh thay, heepth huh hoothy hman huhway. :)




Monday, May 4, 2020

head start


as he headed out for his evening poopies, the little dachshund found himself thinking about how pretty much boring his day had been.  maybe, when i find the right spot, he thought to himself,  i could poop a foot long. or maybe even a swirly ocho. or if i really really tried, maybe even a pretzel! i could even make it a salted pretzel, for extra challenge points. 

but even the challenge of pooping a level eight poop shape did little to assuage the general air of stay at home malaise that fogged his little world. until that is, the little dachshund spied the biggest backyard surprise he had never expected to spy.  his wolfy instincts started to tingle with instinctual glee.  
   
mister rabbit, we have not met before, so i feel it is important for you to understand that i possess a very particular set of skills. and because i am so ferocious, and mostly because i am also currently tethered to my very slow running mother, i will give u the opportunity to take a three second head start in the direction of your choosing. but after time is up, know that i will find u, i will chase u, and i will chomp u.” 




Friday, May 1, 2020

strawberry picnic for one :)

the little dachshund traveled carefully up the ramp, headed for his bed in the front of his home while keeping his eyes focused on the precious giant strawberry he balanced upon his nose. hee hee, he thought to himself, there are many things in this world that a wolf must quickly chomp, chomp chomp, no matter where he is, but strawberries? a wolfust nibble giant strawberries like this slowly, while baking in the warmth of the afternoon sun! 




Wednesday, April 29, 2020

almost there


but... if the glass man puts glass walls around everything, then how will a wolf esca- i mean how will a wolf get out when the purple flower stink bottle comes out and water comes on? 




Monday, April 27, 2020

while u were gardening :)

um...well, mom, r u sure u want to come back inside right this moment? because, well, not that me and duk duk were up to anything,  of course, but things might smell better if u maybe come back in just a little while.  like, u know, o, eight...or nine minhours or so? 




Friday, April 24, 2020

silent running


the little wolf loved his mother dearly, but there were times when he wished she could run just a little faster. :)





Wednesday, April 22, 2020

dump trucking


rawwr! rawwrrrr!



rawwwwwr! rawwwwwr!



rawwwwwwwr! rawwwwwwr!



see, mom? that’s pretty much how a ferocious brontosaurus goes for a walkie. only, well maybe when he poops, his snakeys are like a zillion times bigger, so we probably would have to follow him with a dump truck  :) 




Monday, April 20, 2020

have chomp will travel

but mom, i am pretty sure all this social distancing stuff does not apply to wolves and bunnies. :)








Friday, April 17, 2020

adjectverbally speaking


well, i was just stinking i mean thinking, if u me n dad all walkie to the chikky filyay drive thru, and, well, if we all wear the masks u made, then we can be fairly and deliciously socially distant. u know, instead of just, socially distant. :) 





Wednesday, April 15, 2020

stink floats


hee hee, um, mom, u might want to hold your breath in about two seconds :) 




Monday, April 13, 2020

stir crazy:)

hee hee, no u quit it. i’m just waiting here quietly like mom asked us to... well, it is not my fault u ate so many smelly jelly beans, duk duk. hee hee, well technically not my fault. but any-



phoowee! omg, duk duk, that was riper than the time we put a cheezy rind and the crusty crusts from our egg salad sandwiches in the dryer. and that was only yesterday. ah memories...o, or the time, when we put tuna, and kool aid powder, and cabbage in the washer? yeah that smelly.  hee hee, also yesterday come to think of it. o, i think mom is finally coming..



mom, i know we are supposed to be waiting here quietly until u r ready to take our picture to send to the pee m v for our new pedal license, but do u think maybe we could wait quietly down in the laundry room? i mean, not to suggest that u should be doing laundry or anything. i mean, like, well, we just want to wait down there for no real reason really. :)




Friday, April 10, 2020

two seconds to chomp

Quietly calculating newton’s minimum chomp convergence quotient in his head, the little dachshund patiently waited as the tiny tomato started its journey on the inevitable path to his rumbly little tummy. :)




Monday, April 6, 2020

communicable

 
um, nopies, mom. super advanced wolf and falcon research has proven that cassie’s cooties can transmit even with social distancing.  i think me and dad are just gonna stay here thank u.. :)