sausage and plaid hot pocket

There are sounds in his household that every little wolf learns to recognize and act accordingly. A knock at the front door requires ferocious and incessant barking, tiny chumley knows, while the sound of the dryer opening merits a prompt and speedy appearance by the laundry room door, lest he miss out on becoming the roasty toasty sausagey center of a lavender and vanilla scented, hot laundry pile shaped bun.   And the sound of his lunchy lunch being made? Well that requires a wolf's full and focused attention, no matter what it his he might already be doing. :) 

hand me downs

hthaz hokay hmom, I hoo noth hare hwhat hullor mhy hoothrush ith htho longh ash ith hath hpoultree fhlavored hoothpathe hon hit. :) 

the not so secret life of pet wolves

well mom, if u cannot see the irony of leaving me at home all alone on a Sunday afternoon while u and dad go see the secret life of pets with the little misses and their mom and dad, then I think I am perfectly ok keeping my back turned and letting my tail and ears speak for all of me. 

something 2 b jelly about :)

hee hee well mom, I guess if u make us more corn on the cob, me and duk duk could make u one too. :) 

the hungry little wolf :)

'o our dear mother will never notice just one tiny tomato missing from today's bountiful harvest,' the mighty and ferocious wolf told his watchful falcon friend. and then he ate another... 

happy 4thie day

hee hee, okay okay.."four score and threeveteenzillion years ago, our founding fathers stepped foot on a new continent and pretty much decided after a while that it would be nice to have a holiday in the summer where u could grill stuff and stream movies and be thankful for air conditioning. they took this idea to their founding fathers thinking they might want to celebrate too, only our founding fathers forgot that their founding fathers neither possessed space travel or time travel capabilities so they had no idea what air conditioning or movie streaming was really about. or movies, really.  so, our founding fathers jumped back on their dragon and flew to the moon - well they called it the pendants back then - so they flew to the pendants and told the people and wolves and Falcons who were preparing for the party to go ahead and plan it without their grand founding fathers but to hurry up because any minute now a sand snake was going to surface and if they did not blast off soon it would really mess up their party plans. and as they blasted off one of the ferocious wolves declared, 'smell u later, poopinators!' and although technically he was not on the ground when he said it, because he was still in the pendant's air space, well, that is why we still know it as our declaration in the pendants. oh, and through the years really, not much has changed about how we celebrate in the pendants day except now when we party  on the 4th, we also play disco music." okay I think that should be good enough, dontchoo duk duk? now we can settle down for a nice nappie and some cheese  and - 

um, yes mom we finished our very throughly researched blog post for the Fourth of July. it has a picture we made and everything :)

twelve little duks :)

Twelve little duks on a hot summer day, popped out of the wolf's heat cave so they could play! :)

pb smelly jelly :)

o, I dunno, mom. because today is Wednesday? :) 

(ps thank u very much mister Jim for these peanut butter and smelly jelly snackies. they are #DELICIOUS) :) :)

runway ramp art

hee hee, over the river and up the ramp to - wait, what's that, mom?  why yes, i did notice the super cool painting u scored at the thrift store and even though all the art is stylistically different, i think it works really with the other artwork here on this wall   i like the colors, and the texture, and yes i agree hanging it upside down makes way more sense than hanging up right side up. and, well, i would really like to stay and talk about it more, but me and duk duk have to - well, okay, mom, but we have to make it snappy because the duk duks will be back from the creek any minute now with the u know whats and then we need to go over to little miss julia's to work on our next video project and then we have to set up for tonitey nite's super duk duk robot rave disco party extravaganza which as u know will require over fifty bags of gummy worms and eleventy gallons of energy punch which we really need to start making now so it will have time to ferment and get all fizzy and - what's that? oh yes, right, we really should get that picture taken.  u said a serious pose, right? okay, i think i can do this in one take. r u ready?...

let me just turn my head and...limburger cheeeeze!! 

 

hee hee, okay mom i love u smell u later bye bye!! :)

 

a flock of duk duks

hee hee, mom, with all of duk duk's cousins in town, I think we are going to need a bigger swimmy pool :)  

chunky chicken water mondays

Our house is still swirlier than normal thanks to some paint work Tiny chumley's Unkie D is helping us with, but such disturbances no matter how large or small will ever get in the way of a little wolf and his chunky chicken water Mondays :) 

hee hee mom, I have said it before and I will say it again, our ez pz recipe for chunky chicken water cannot be beat -  just add a boneless chicken breast to water and boil til done, keep the meat and water and have some fun! delicious plain or with added blueberries and carrots and strawberries and extra extra meat :) 

art of deflection :)

hee hee, yeah they are so cool, right duk duk? I wish we did not promise mom that we would wait until she got back home before we could play with them. 

I mean, technically right now I am only trying them on so that is not playing with them. nopies, nosiree. just trying them on. 

and technically, we are not playing only trying them out. and super technically, this is not me going rawwwr rawwwr and holding u in a ferocious crusher claw and pincer grip. because I am a wolf and wolves do not have -  

whoops.  why hello, mother. it is so nice to see u again. I did not hear the door open else I would have enthusiastically greeted you as I always do. did u see the poopie snake I made u? u passed it on the way in and it is a doozy! 

(ickquay ukday ukday, ovemay ackbay otay ymay idesay ndaay iay illway rytay otay seuay ymay owerspay foay eflectionday erhay enwhay eshay omescay ackbay)

oh u did not find it? o that is right, I forgot. dad took me out and I pooped outside. other than that, we have not been doing very much really, besides looking at facebooky and texting and stuff. did u maybe get anything supercool from tj maxx or homegoods while u were out? :) 

said the little wolf

Said the little wolf, "i will open my mouth and i will chomp..."

"and I will chomp..."

"..and I will chomp until the white meat shows!" :)

poopie milkshake malty float, mighty crusher sinks the boat

hee hee hee, o this tickles more than I would have ever imagined!! okay, okay, I promise I will try to stay still.

 hee hee. o that so tickles! okay, no really. no more fidgeting. poopie milkshake malty float, mighty crusher sinks the boat! what? o sometimes I make up rhymey stuff because it helps me focus on other things and that way I can ignore what is really happening. like, well, u know, when the tushie man does the uknowwhat to my uknowwhere, completely disregarding EVery sign I specifically hang there even though it clearly states... wait, what do U mean mom? hmm, I really had not thought of that, but maybe u r right. I wonder what rhymes he says while I am saying mine...

anyhow, i sure hope duk duk comes back soon with the info we need. if I remember correctly, there is a 50-50 chance of it being either on the right or left side. but for me, right now I am thinking right for crusher and left for pincer , dontchoo think, mom?  

hee hee, whoops sorry I moved again, my bad. mom, thank u for agreeing to help me draft my patterns. once we get them all drawn up, if u do not mind us borrowing your scissors and sewing machine, we can cut the fabric and sew them in a jiffy! :)

dog and honeybee :)

The little dachshund spied the buzzy honey bee resting on the window screen and stood up on his tippy tip toes to greet him.  "why smello, mister buzzy bee. it is so very nice to see you again. I am so glad u r enjoying the pollen from our pretty lavender and delicious tomato plants. if u have a moment to spare, I would like to ask u a very important question."

"First, I would like to say that I may not be a bee and I may not fly from flower to flower collecting pollen, but I am a ferocious wolf and as u already know ferocious wolves can do pretty much anything, just like how I spied u sitting quietly on this screen, even though my mom did not, though she is not a wolf and as u already know, a wolf can do pretty much anything once he puts his mind to it. although sometimes it helps to well, u know, ask questions. which brings me to what I would like to ask you.."  

"can you please show me how to make honey come out of my butt too?" :)

double plus good :)

hee hee okay mom, I double ferocious paw swear on it. except maybe on holidays in which case we will arrange for chocobot or lulu the tiger to feed it. now can me and duk duk have a #LobsterCar? 

summer lobster

oh, just sitting here like a lobster by your purse so in case u decide to go somewhere, mom, u will not forget to take me, too. do u like my mighty lobster pincers?  :) 

popsicle season

Even though school isn't over yet, homemade popsicle season has officially begun here in our magical little household. And even though a certain tiny wolf and his best friend falcon are not always able to participate, they have, as always, found a way to make the most of things by making do. :)

hee hee, little miss Julia and dad, although I have never tasted one, I bet u r  enjoying the red popsicles I see u r eating and if so, may I highly recommend that u both come inside after and try our yellow ones next bc me and duk duk made them from the finest of all natural ingredients, if u know what I mean? oh, and try our pudding pops, too.  they are velvety delicious and this week only, filled with corn :) 

lump sum

hee hee, sure, duk duk, no really, keep going and get all the stuff we talked about. I can wait. just do not take too long because I think pretty soon, this winning ticket is gonna pay out in one lump sum if u know what u mean. 

(pfweeeeoooOOOoot!) whoops, make that one lump sum less interest and handling fees :) 

(ps hello friends! if u r reading this and u r mister mike E, please check your etsy convo for follow up on winning the bid from our tiny auction :) ) 

unbowed, unbent, unbroken

I well, I dunno, mister carpet man. even though it fits me perfectly under foot and would be a nice addition here to my eating area, twenty five bags of gummy worms is an awful lot for this tiny piece of carpet. even if it is hand knotted and made from wool.  and besides, me and duk duk are saving up for a four hundred and fifty horsepower megacycle with spherical torque suspension, custom integrated anti gravitational hoversonic sidecar, and dual independent remote omnidirectional versa drones equipped with lab created ruby laser tech and armor piercing amberillium grappling hooks. painted in color shift micro metallic swirly brown and yellow, for obvious reasons of course.  so I am afraid I am going to have to say nopies and just get on my way because duk duk has been waiting for me forever down by the creek now and he would never forgive me if I spent any of our hard earned...wait, what??

it's a FLYING carpet?? 

mister, i will give u thirty bags of gummy worms. :) :)