pooperihelion

hee hee, see? i told u i am still growing, mom. now can we please increase my kibble and snackie allowance? :)

the scentient sentinel

hee hee, dad, i’m pretty sure that is not how u use that thing.

no seriuously, dad, i’ve watched mom use it like a gazillion times and she never - i mean, u cannot be doing it right bc it doesn’t even smell in here and that pretty much is like the only reason why i personally would even consider - wait, what?

fixing it? what do u mean ?

but dad, i mean, if it is doing that all by itself...i mean, well, dontchoo see?? after all these years of “using” it, we were actually feeding it. and now, finally, it has evolved and become self aware and here u r taking its lid off trying to fix it when really there is nothing here at all to fix. in fact, we should be celebrating its ascent into sentience with like, a party or something really. not gutting it like some common - dad? dad r u even listening to me?

mom, can u please tell dad that he is interfering with a highly complex situation beyond his understanding and that he should put everything back and cease all operations immediately?

o and tell him if he finds any tightly wrapped packages of gummy worms marked top secret do not show duk duk on them - well if he finds anything like that, like behind its water tank or something, then i am pretty sure it did that. u know, because it became self aware and all. :)

goodbye 2018

Once a year on this very day, for a very brief moment, tiny chumley becomes a tall little wolf, exposing his heart shaped tummy to the world in all its rounded pink glory so that we can say goodbye to the year that was. I'd love to say I remember why we started this tradition, but as with all things random, I don't. In fact, it's all I can do to remember to wear a different outfit every year for our photo, while mother nature lends a helping hand and takes care of the tweaks in the little kilebasa's appearance, swirling his underside in lighter shades of tummy pink and dappling it with dark little spots, while painting the rest of his body in wintery white using bolder, broader brush strokes. 

2018 was a challenging year for our tiny family in real life, but through it all we had our makey makes, and we had this little boy and his merry band of poop and gummy worm obsessed toyfriends, always there to remind us that beauty, love and acceptance comes in all shapes and sizes, and that joy and comfort is just a smelly laugh away.  Thanks, friends, for all the support and love in 2018. :)  

boba time :)

well, only because my head is still spinning from all the christmas candy me and duk duk ate yesterday, do u think i could please have a strawberry smoothie with double regular boba not popping boba with one swirly whippy cream and theee cherries on top? :)

merry christmas eve :)

The demands of real life have been especially challenging this year, and our tiny family trio is as grateful as ever for this little cyberslice of doxie joy, and the incredible friends who share it with us and enjoy the happy go lucky makings and musings of our two little ferocious best friends. To all our cyber family, the little kielbasa and I wish the most magical of holidays, filled with love, snackies and, of course, smelly rainbow swirlies. ❤️

to duk duk from your best friend baxter

hee hee, and that’s a wrap on my last present for duk duk!

okay, mom, now can me and duk duk write our letter to santa? bc, well, i mean, i realize as u can see here by all this bounty that me and duk duk got ourselves a lot of presents already, but...well, it would probably make sense to ask him for other stuff. just to, well, u know, help with the toxic odors that may or may not permeate the air when me and duk duk open the presents we are giving each other on christmas morning. :)

backseat gps

dad...hey dad, u r totally going the wrong way. the candy store is on the other side of town by the place that smells like cheetos and pennies..dad..dad, no u missed like the most perfect place to make a u turn cuz now u r going to have to make a pooperdil across like eleventy lanes of traffic and
even during non holidays it is a pain in the poopertootie at this time of day. dad...dad! omg u missed another chance to pick up the bypass and that would have saved us like, o, seven minutes of travel time. which is really important bc i am not getting any young-

-er. dad, seriously, if u want i can drive. just pull over and move my car seat to the front bc i like the xtra height so i can see over the hood...

oo dad, if u hang a derecho the chikky fil yay is only like fifty pedals beyond the intersection, and they give bonus treats every tootsday which
is pretty much every day if u know what i mean...

dad? dad?

mom, can we switch places cuz it seems dad cannot hear a word i am saying...

waiting :)

(sigh)...... (sigh).... mom...

why isn’t it christmas already?

eleventy parts ferocious

hee hee, thanks, mom for making my birthday crown again this year.

it is exactly what me and duk duk wanted, really, what with it being one part supercool, one part where the wild stinks are, and like, eleventy parts ferocious. and it is the kind of crown a wolf could wear every day really. the only thing is, and i cannot believe i am saying this, the only thing is, well, at eleventy parts ferocious, i kind of.. i kind of wish there was a ferociousness dial because even at twelve i am not sure i can always -

uh oh, mom- u better - i cannot hold- run before..o no its com-

raWwwwwwRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! :)

today i am twelve :)

sigh, i know!  it feels like we have totally been waiting for forever plus infinity already.  u would think by now that mom would know not to keep such ferocious beasts waiting. i mean, it is not every day a wolf turns twelve. and after all, if she does not feed us soon, why, she should know by now that it is much easier to feed the wild things than let them fend for themselves. i mean, there will be blood and guts ev-- o wait i think i hear her coming!!

hee hee hee...oooOOOOooOOOooOOooooOOOoooo! something tells me being twelve is going to be my best ferocious year ever! :)

the tiny tomato

The tiny tomato rolled along on the floor, happily rolling from bump to bump and humming the happy-go-luckiest tune he could think of . And yet, he couldn’t shake the feeling that something was about to happen...

when a wolf knows how santa knows what a wolf knows that santa knows how he knows :)

hee hee, see, mom?

all my paws clean and tidy, just like u asked. duk duk helped me use a nail brush and everything. o, and we did all our chores, too, plus our chores for tomorrow even :) :)

(um, mom, in case santa was not paying attention, do u think we can do that again from the top, only this time louder? o, and with more feeling?)

how lovely are thy branches

ooooo looky!! hey duk duk, get your falcon butt over here - mom fixed the lights and finished decorating the tree!!

oo i see the gang’s all here - wolfy from miss debbi, and turbo from mister nico and mister tadhg, and me when i was little, and our robot orbament, and our snow pup, and, our brushy ornaments, and our stuffy ornaments and...heyyyy...

mom, where are all the new poopie snake ornaments me and duk duk made??

scooby trap :)

hee hee, well, mom, i would like to goto school today but...

(errrrrgh)

(errrrrrrrrgh) (errrrrrrrgh)

i am sorry, mom, but i do not seem to be able to break free from the powerful booby trap that someone must have put out to specifcally trap a very ferocious wolf like me. in fact, it is so powerful i could be stuck here for hours. perhaps maybe u could email teacher and let her know i will not be able to attend today? :)

snuggle day :)

mom, i know today thanksgiving is over now but..well, do u think santa would mind if i skipped school today so we could snuggle in bed? :)

maybe probably :)

mom, dontchoo think u me and dad could just skip this whole nail thing and maybe we can just, o, i dunno, maybe probably goto the snackie store and the trebuchet store and then the chikky fil-a instead? )

in a six (or nine) wolf open sleigh!

hee hee, yeah duk duk, i do not know which one i would pick, either.

i mean, well, with six teeny weenies, the mark six is already a powerful, above entry level option. and it is really cool, what with the tiny frosted gold chain reins...

and the rich red corninthian leather sleigh built for speed and comfort

but the mark nine in ferocious fang white with after market pro x4 internal methane combustion coupling system? well that’s just top of the line, isn’t it?

i mean, it is like the first vehicle ever whose interlinked coupling system relies solely on the foofie generated by teeny weenies. and no tiny chain reins means a quieter ride that allows u to truly enjoy the true and gassy noises of your ride. plus, i mean have u looked at the payload?

the mark nine red corinthian leather sleigh is capable of hauling eleventy gigsnakes to deserving boys and girls everywhere!

yeppies, duk duk, they take so long to make, we only have these two sleigns to offer for cyber brown wednesday, but hopefully we can get mom to make after the holidays. and besides, our storybook teeny weenie mecharamas will be available too and they would be perfect for leaving out all year round.

what’s that, duk duk? hee hee hee, o lemme check..

nopies, not smelly enough! i guess we know what we will be doing today!! :)

beauty and the beast

hee hee, mom, do u think maybe u can ask duk duk to do it because my ferocious ear flappies still need twenty more minutes of deep conditioning. :)

turnout 2018

hee hee, yeah, hey thanks for voting, mister, come back next year....thanks for voting, other mister, hope it was swirly...o yeah, i see u earned a sticker, too. thanks for voting..hey lady, come back next year. o and miss, thanks for voting...what’s that? this? no, this is for next year’s election. u see..

wolves are so ferocious, they have to vote early so as to not scare off or influence any other voters. and falcons, well, they can early vote, too, but like i was telling duk duk - sometimes the danger in mixing falcons and wolves is that their, um, votes can be so sm-

wait, what’s that? o sorry, i did not mean to keep u - thanks for voting and do come back next year. in fact, come sooner because we can always use more votes, no matter what shape they are. yeah, okay bye bye.

hey thanks for voting, hope it was delightful. yeah thanks lady and mister smell u later...

mom, i do not see any gas masks. r u sure everyone gets a voting sticker for being a good boy or girl and pooping outside today?

paydirt

(sniff sniff) (sniff sniff) (sniff sniff sniff)

(snooooooooooooooooooooort) hee hee oo yes, perfect!!

hey, duk duk, go tell chocobot to bring his chocobutt over here cuz i think this wolf just found the perfect uknowwhere for our uknowwhat. :)