quack three times

hee hee, no, duk duk, u can go if u want to but i toldjoo already i am not moving an inch until mom starts another hungry games. last time it was chicken jerky versus mackerel and greens and before that it was cherry tomato vs chicken jerky. i did not know it was even possible, but the stakes seem to be getting higher and even more deliciouser.
besides, what r u even doing back there by my tushie? u know how dan-

(pfweeeeOoooOOOOOooOooT!)

-gerous it can be. hee hee, whoopsie. um, i cannot really see u so quack once if u r still conscious, twice if u need urgent medical assistance, and three times if u do not want me to eat your share of dessert tonitey nite. :)

the hungry games: pooping fire follow up

Hello my friends, it's me, Baxter, your roving rover reporter here to report that the correct answer to yesterday's hungry games was b, salmon!  If you guessed right, congratulations! And if u did not, do not worry. My tummy and I say it really could have gone either way.

In fact - if I could just take a moment to clean up these dishes....

(clink clink clanky clank!)


...in fact, methinks my tummy and I still have more to say -

More please! :)

Hee hee, this is Baxter your roving rover reporter hoping you have a wonderful weenie pup filled weekend! :)

the hungry games: pooping fire

Hello everybuddy, it's me, Baxter, your roving rover reporter! This year I did not go to the doxie weenie roast like I was thinking I might, so I thought I would do the next best thing to kick off summer - hold my own very special mini hungry games! Today's challenge is a toughie, pitting (a) two delicious and rare mouthwatering pieces of chicken jerky and rawhide twirly sticks that I like, never get except when they are used as candles on my birthday cake, against (b) a snifferiffic spoon of salmony canned goodness, which I also have not had in a while on account of how mom thinks it makes me butt scooty! Yep, I know, a super duper toughie because tummy totally wants to eat both.  But the question every hungry games must answer is, which one will I try to eat first?

 

Now, a lot of data has been recorded regarding my performance at the hungry games, so I thought before I give u the answer, I would let you comment your guess as to which option, A or B, I will go for first.  And then I will tell you the results tomorrow.  So, this is me, Baxter, your roving rover reporter, signing off and wishing you the best of luck at guessing! :)

hungry games 2013: the blue plate special

There are a few things I thought I knew about tiny chumley as a result of our playing the hungry games.  First, when given a choice between two equivalent snackies set before him side by side, he almost always chooses to eat the one on his right first.  Second, that he would always choose the stinkiest snackie first when given the choice between two different ones.  And third, that because I knew about One and Two, it would be fairly easy predict the ending to any hungry games with some simple two out of three eliminiation trials just to be sure things were kept fair and unbiased.

At least, that is what I thought I knew.   Til time and time again during yesterday's games, I watched tiny chumley pick first from his left, and pick that snackie regardless of how stinky it was.  Test after test after test.  Left before right?  Chicken before Stinky fish bites?  And we haven't even gotten to the star of the show yet.  Okay, I started to wonder as tiny chumley's tummy grew rounder and rounder with each passing trial, was yesterday Bizarro Tuesday and I didn't even know it? 

Tiny chumley looked at me with a glint in his eye as I contemplated my next move.  well, are we playing this or aren't we, mom? my tummy is waaaa-itinnnng!

He had me going for a while more, filling his tummy while the hungry games stalled without a clear leader. His tummy, in cahoots with his brain, telling him to pick from his left regardless of what snackie was in it.    Til I wondered what would happen if I also switched the plates.

ding ding! today i've been picking the blue plate special -  it's a tasty winner every time!!

Guess next time I need to break out the matching fine china. :)

 
 

scenes from a sunday brunch with an only dachshund: let's do halfsies :)

..and so the monkey said, "leave it? i thoughtchoo said throw it!"  hee hee, yeah i know, dad, that is a pretty funny joke isn't it?  one of the kids in school told it for show n tell but he got in trouble because during recess everyone including me thought it would be funny if we started throwing our --- oh, i see our waitress wants to take my order.  please excuse me...

no thank you, miss waiteress, i am sure your food is very delicious but today i brought my own food because i am on a diet and i want to be fit for this summer's hungry games.   but if you would leave me the bowl i see you have in your hands, i would very much appreciate it for use with my kibble.  :)



















so anyway dad, speaking about this summer, i wantchoo to know that me and duk duk and chocobot and lil pink puppy all want to help you build a monorail in our backyard.  or maybe an air plane landing strip.  it is phase one of our twelve part summer plan.  which i wish i could tell you more about but it is top secret and only people with a need to know will know and even then they will know only what they need to know and nothing more.   it's that top secret.  oh, i hear our waiteress coming back.  boy that was fast!

oooOOOoooOOoooooo! mom, u got crispy corned beef hash with two poached eggs!! if u want maybe we go halfsies? i know she did not bring two forks but...hmmm,  here, hang on a sec, i got this...

you eat your half of the corned beef hash and in the meanwhile i will pour half my kibble in my bowl and u then can have the rest!! :)

 
 

secret hungry games: test 1 results

 












hello again ladies and gentlemen and we're here at the secret hungry games stadium where sir baxby dukken cesar has just completed his first i-should-be-studying secret hungry games test.  and ladies and gentlemen, yeah u guessed it right -  the answer is... apple pumpkin snackie!  yipppeee hooray wooty hoo!










now ladies and gentlemen, i have just been informed that the secret hungry games is no longer secret and that somebuddy better start studying so unfortunately i must bid u a very fond toodleydoo but...


 (shushy shush whisper voice)






maybe after i am done me n duk duk can meetchoo on the playground and play guess-who-pooped-in-tunnel together, okay?   :) :)

study break: aka the secret hungry games - squeaky squirrel vs apple pumpkin flower snackie

dunt duh dah!  la-deees and gentlemen! welcome to the secret hungry games where the visually anonymous sir baxby dukken cesar is getting ready for his first secret hungry games challenge, super squeaky squirrel vs apple pumpkin flower snackie!  will sir baxby dukken cesar side with his bottomless tummy and go for the favorite to win in this match by picking the delicious smelling apple pumpkin flower snackie, or, after working on his homework for a thuffering thuccotathy seven whole minutes, will sir baxby dukken cesar's inner wolf  prompt him to pick the underdog, super squeaky squirrel,  for a much needed serious squeaky break?  dunt duh dah! post your bets in the comments below and find out the facts tomorrow! 

 





(pssst- if u think u figured out who sir baxby dukken cesar actually is, can you please not tell my mom bcuz as u can guess, i..um, he should be studying! :) :)
 

the hungry games: wet food vs watermelon best 2 of 3results

Why hello friends, it's me, Baxter your roving reporter reporting to you today on the results of my very difficult test, wet food versus watermelon.  And ta-da - can you believe there was the upset of the century in round one because - did u guess it? - watermelon beat wet food!!  I could not believe it either, which is why my tummy wanted to do best 2 out of 3.  And how yep, wet food finally won the day no matter what side it was on.  Although the watermelon appetizer was very nice, I must say.


 

Anyhoo,  I hope you enjoyed finding out the results from today's hungry game and hope that u might try it too.  Who knows, maybe you might just pick a watermelon appetizer too!


This is Baxter your roving rover reporter wishing you a super Saturday!! :)

the hungry games: wet food vs watermelon

Well hello everybuddy, it's me, Baxter, your roving rover reporter reporting to you today cuz my mom spent practically all day shopping for dud fabrics yesterday and so she left it up to me to write today's post.  So I thought, what an excellent time to break out the hardest but yummiest hungry games test yet, canned wet food vs watermelon! I know, it's a super toughie, right?  Like Michael Phelps vs Ryan Lochte tough.  Or even, Scooby Doo vs Benji tough.

Oh, and, to make it more statistically relevant, and way more tummy fulfilling, we are going to do this test not once, not twice, but three whole times!

So place your bets my friends and let me know what u think will happen with each and every test - will I choose the pinky sweet delightful goodness of watermelon like I did when I tested with cherry tomato? Or will I choose palate pleasing poultry goodness?  Or will I even choose the same thing every time?  Oooh the possibilities are endless!

This is Baxter your roving rover reporter wishing you good luck and may the guessing force be with you! :)

the hungry games: cherry tomato vs watermelon results

and the answer is....watermelon! :) :)

 

hee hee, thank you for playing with me! now i must go hide bcuz i hear i am overdue for getting my nails done. :)

the hungry games: cherry tomato vs watermelon

Well hello everybuddy, it's me, Baxter, your roving rover reporter, reporting to you today from the Hungry Games where we're just about to start test number 5.  Now, during the commerical break you may have missed a quickie but to some very astonishing upset in the impromptu test, mini vs megasaurus rawhide.  Would I go for the small piece of rawhide first on my right and have it all to myself, or would my very opportunistic tummy choose megasaurus rawhide on my left and only have a few minutes with it?  The results might amaze you...

Now, we're on to today's test, watermelon vs cherry tomato and it's a toughie.  Will my tummy tell me to first go for the cute slices of delicious cherry tomato on my right/your left or the yummy cubes of watermelon on my left/your right? They smell very yummy and are very tempting and I can tell you already the waiting is making me want to bark bark bark! But I will try not to and just put my ears back a little and make my eyes do just like so...

  

Okay my friends, it is time to write in your guess and tomorrow I will tell you the results! This is Baxter your roving rover reporter wishing you a very happy hungry games! :)

the hungry games: strawberry vs blueberry

Well hello again my friends, it's me, Baxter, chief yummyologist and roving rover science reporter reporting to you today with the result from our first ever trials in the Hungry Game. Shall we jump right to it? The first test was strawberry versus blueberry. And the question is, which one will I want to eat first?  My tummy says...

Hee hee, yeah that was too easy, right? But they were both very delicious, let me assure you.  Now, the second test would be a little trickier to guess if u knew that I am right pawed and therefore tend to choose the thing that is on my the right side.  Will I go for the one piece of kibble on my right, or break with tradition and choose more?  My tummy says...

 

 But wait, if I chose strawberries over blueberries and chose more over less, what will I do when faced with the difficult decision in this next test between more blueberries and less strawberries? The answer?   

 

Well my friends, that is all my diet will allow me to test for now, but do not worry, I am certain we will be playing this game again and when I do, my tummy and I will be sure to report about it to you. This is Baxter, your roving rover science reporter and chief yummyologist, wishing you a very happy and delicious Monday!! :)

introducing: the hungry games!

Why hello, it's me, Baxter, your chief yummyologist and roving rover science reporter.   I'm here today to report to you on a special new segment I like to call The Hungry Games.  And it's all about someone I know very well - me! Only here in the Hungry Games, I'm turning the tables and asking you how well you know me - or your own pup! 

To play along in the Hungry Games is really easy, because all you have to do is guess which snackie I or your pup will eat first in each test.  Today there are three tests - strawberry vs blueberry, one vs three pieces of kibble, and three blueberries vs one strawberry.  Do you think you know the answers? Did you try this with your own hungry little friend?  If so, feel free post your comment here or on my facebooky .  And tomorrow, I will let you know the answer to my tests!! :)

This is Baxter your roving rover science reporter wishing you a very cool sunday and bidding you,  dooo deee dooo dooo doooo dooo dooo!