world record

pee-eew! these purple flowers are so stinky! okay, thank u for doing this, mom, r u ready? on three....one..

two....

threeeEEEEeeeee!



(ooof) 

hee hee hee, didjoo get it? that must have been at least eleventy feet!! can i see the picture?duk duk is going 2 b so jelly.  :)

bruthy bruth :)

hee hee, hi hthed, huh bruthy huh thay, heepth huh hoothy hman huhway. :)

head start

as he headed out for his evening poopies, the little dachshund found himself thinking about how pretty much boring his day had been.  maybe, when i find the right spot, he thought to himself,  i could poop a foot long. or maybe even a swirly ocho. or if i really really tried, maybe even a pretzel! i could even make it a salted pretzel, for extra challenge points. 

but even the challenge of pooping a level eight poop shape did little to assuage the general air of stay at home malaise that fogged his little world. until that is, the little dachshund spied the biggest backyard surprise he had never expected to spy.  his wolfy instincts started to tingle with instinctual glee.  

   

“mister rabbit, we have not met before, so i feel it is important for you to understand that i possess a very particular set of skills. and because i am so ferocious, and mostly because i am also currently tethered to my very slow running mother, i will give u the opportunity to take a three second head start in the direction of your choosing. but after time is up, know that i will find u, i will chase u, and i will chomp u.” 

strawberry picnic for one :)

the little dachshund traveled carefully up the ramp, headed for his bed in the front of his home while keeping his eyes focused on the precious giant strawberry he balanced upon his nose. hee hee, he thought to himself, there are many things in this world that a wolf must quickly chomp, chomp chomp, no matter where he is, but strawberries? a wolfust nibble giant strawberries like this slowly, while baking in the warmth of the afternoon sun! 

almost there

but... if the glass man puts glass walls around everything, then how will a wolf esca- i mean how will a wolf get out when the purple flower stink bottle comes out and water comes on? 

while u were gardening :)

um...well, mom, r u sure u want to come back inside right this moment? because, well, not that me and duk duk were up to anything,  of course, but things might smell better if u maybe come back in just a little while.  like, u know, o, eight...or nine minhours or so? 

silent running

the little wolf loved his mother dearly, but there were times when he wished she could run just a little faster. :)

dump trucking

rawwr! rawwrrrr!

rawwwwwr! rawwwwwr!

rawwwwwwwr! rawwwwwwr!

see, mom? that’s pretty much how a ferocious brontosaurus goes for a walkie. only, well maybe when he poops, his snakeys are like a zillion times bigger, so we probably would have to follow him with a dump truck  :) 

have chomp will travel

but mom, i am pretty sure all this social distancing stuff does not apply to wolves and bunnies. :)

adjectverbally speaking

well, i was just stinking i mean thinking, if u me n dad all walkie to the chikky filyay drive thru, and, well, if we all wear the masks u made, then we can be fairly and deliciously socially distant. u know, instead of just, socially distant. :) 

stink floats

hee hee, um, mom, u might want to hold your breath in about two seconds :) 

stir crazy:)

hee hee, no u quit it. i’m just waiting here quietly like mom asked us to... well, it is not my fault u ate so many smelly jelly beans, duk duk. hee hee, well technically not my fault. but any-

phoowee! omg, duk duk, that was riper than the time we put a cheezy rind and the crusty crusts from our egg salad sandwiches in the dryer. and that was only yesterday. ah memories...o, or the time, when we put tuna, and kool aid powder, and cabbage in the washer? yeah that smelly.  hee hee, also yesterday come to think of it. o, i think mom is finally coming..

mom, i know we are supposed to be waiting here quietly until u r ready to take our picture to send to the pee m v for our new pedal license, but do u think maybe we could wait quietly down in the laundry room? i mean, not to suggest that u should be doing laundry or anything. i mean, like, well, we just want to wait down there for no real reason really. :)

two seconds to chomp

Quietly calculating newton’s minimum chomp convergence quotient in his head, the little dachshund patiently waited as the tiny tomato started its journey on the inevitable path to his rumbly little tummy. :)

communicable

 

um, nopies, mom. super advanced wolf and falcon research has proven that cassie’s cooties can transmit even with social distancing.  i think me and dad are just gonna stay here thank u.. :)

wabbit seasoning

Whether it’s chasing the bunnies he sees outside, or helping ourselves to yet another delicious smackerel of something or other, tiny chumley always has a better idea of what we could be doing with our day. But sometimes, the needs of the world take precedence, and all he can do is quietly watch and wait.  

 

tub thumping

well, maybe do u think we can put the old tub faucet back temporarily, mom? duk duk has not had a good swimmy swim for weeks now and even ferocious falcons need their exercise :) 

two pees in a pod :)

hee hee, dad, now that we are far enough away and mom cannot hear us, let’s go to the new greenway and pee off the bridge :) 

live long and poop :)

mom, this show is great and all but, we are practically at the end of the season now and he has not shown anybuddy his pee card.  :) 

a time to sew

hee hee, o goody, time for us to do good for the world and sew again.

hurry up duk duk and put the pedal to the metal.

these  mask covers aren’t gonna sew themselves, u know. and i already told mom we would make and donate a zillion of them. :)

I really hadn’t planned on making mask covers for the pandemic. I’ve read all the same things you have about how ineffective they are. But what really clicked is when I read a fb post that indicated a need from some area houspitals for mask covers, to hopefully allow our healthcare workers to prolong use of their commercially made n95 masks. And possibly a need to use other types of fabric masks behind a face shield. I get it, these are imperfect solutions to an imperfect problem. But all the signs were there that tiny chumley and I needed to join the growing movement that is providing last line defense for those who need it. My years of hoarding fabric, getting stuff that spoke to me but did not yet have a purpose,  and holding on to scraps from projects gone by.  

Some of our friends might recognize the some of fabrics in our first batch of mask covers. They are the bits and bobs of bias tape left over from our dapper doxie dud making days, made so long ago now that sadly, we’ve had to say goodbye to a few of them. But now, their memories can live on, serving yet another magical purpose.  

I’ve chosen first to make a version of the instructables  ab mask cover pattern designed by a nurse. But very quick and ezpz mask patterns abound, one of the more popular being the deaconess mask tutorial.  If you are inspired to sew masks or mask covers as well, know that there is likely an organization that can help not only with supplying materials, patterns, skills, but also matching up / getting your finished masks to those who have expressed a need for them. Search in facebook for a face mask warrior group for your state, or google online for face mask warriors. And I’m sure there are other organizations as well, or more direct conduits for donation if you prefer that as well.  

Physically divided by social distancing, know that we can still  come together and make a difference. :) 

waste not want not :)

hee hee, well, mom, u see, well, what with us not going to the grocery store as much, and well, what with us not wanting to waste anything...

...me and duk duk thought maybe we could use our lettuce ends and grow our own bait to trap the easter bunny this year. and then, chomp! ezpz easter dinner :)