meanwhile in other future doot makeys

um, just dyeing some paper for me and duk duk’s next genius idea. o, which reminds me, mom, may we use some of your dye...that we...are already using? :)

picture perfect :) DOOT TODAY

There’s always something to be learned with a dachshund in the house. Their mix of stubborn and adorable, of perseverance and determination.  It usually means they get their way. Like, practically all the time. Because they have mastered the art of being patiently impatient. Because, in the garbled words of Captain America, I can do impatient all day. 

That’s pretty much what tiny chumley was telling me from the moment I grabbed some extra kibble for our photo shoot for today’s wooly bear hat doot. My objective? Cute well posed photos of a patient little wolf modeling . adorable hats . For today’s doots. His objective?  Snackies. In my mouth. Now. 

A hand full of hastily handed out snackies later, I reviewed the photos I took of my little hat wearing model, and realized that most of them weren’t quite exactly the perfectly posed little boy looking into the camera photos of yore.  And yet, chock full of personality, they were more perfect than any perfectly posed photo could be. 

And so the listings for today’s wooly bear hat doots at noon and nine pm eastern standard time will have a happy mix of posed and less posed shots. Because being perfect is overrated. And being imperfect? Well, that is everything.  And I hope these hats help your little wolves achieve perfect holiday photo imperfection, too. :) 

bouncy bouncies

hee  hee, um, nopies, mom, me and duk duk have not finished our sunday chores yet. but, may i please finish doing bouncy bouncies with dad first? we are almost at the part where he blasts me off to the ceiling and then i try not to hurl on the way back down. :)

lumpy smelly

hmmmmmmmm....(sniff sniff)....

...hmmmmmmmmmm...(sniff sniff)...uh-oh..

um, mom, u didn’t happen to wash my blankie did u? the lumpy one? the lumpy smelly one? the one i asked y not 2 wash because it may or may not have been hiding my secret stash of uknowwhats? 

wednesdae

hee hee, well, dad and i were stinking maybe today we could go for a walkie to the ice cream store. u know, for a gummy worm sundae. because wednesdays are the new sundaes :) 

one foot forward :)

what, mom? how come? well, u see..

..a wolf always has to be ready to take action. u know, like to run, or to pounce, or to stalk, or to chomp. anything ferocious really. it all starts with one foot forward. always. :)

dance lesson

hee hee, sure mom, i can show u how to dance the swoopie poopie. first, u put your left paw out, wag your tail, and, well i think u might know the rest ... :)

it came from above

the little dachshund had been patiently sitting by the front door, convinced as he always was that something interesting was bound to happen if he waited long enough.  

his tummy started to rumble. i know that technically it is past our yesterday dinner time but today is today, mister tummy. and today time is different than yesterday time. so we still have another hour to go before mom will give us our meal. besides, something tells me that if we leave now we totally will be missing out on ... hey do i hear the same humming i do? 

no sooner did the little dachshund ask the question than it appeared before him, a small, buzzy craft cautiously hovering up the steps, awed by the ferociousness it had just spied. 

hee hee, why smello, mister alien craft! do not worry i will not chomp you. and please, come inside, we have much to discuss. :)

windy day :)

see, mom? i am not blowing away at all. so now maybe can i go dig in the backyard and finish the foundation for me and duk duk’s new wolf and falcon cave? 

root cellar

the little dachshund sneaked over to the kitchen, opening the cabinet under the sink for the eleventy hundredth time. 

hee hee, yeppies, it still works!, he thought to himself as the light from the cabinet limned the shadows of his sausagey body. every single time i open the door. like clockwork really, only lights - especially not motion sensor ones - lights are not anything like clocks, so i guess maybe i should say ..well, whatever really. all that matters is that it comes on and goes off. absolutely perfect-o! 

and with one last giggle, the little dachshund started emptying the cabinet, hoping to make room for the most magnificent of his overwintering poopie snake masterpieces.  

pandemoween

well, maybe instead of trick or treating this year, we can just buy the mega bags of candy we like and eat it ourselves.  

when a wolf wants 2 know

hee hee hee. hmmmm....hmmmmm...

nopies, no buttons or switches anywhere....i wonder if maybe i ...

o smello, mom. i was just..um.. well.. okay, i guess i am just gonna ask it...how can i get this thing to smell the way it smells when u and dad sit on it? 

hot cross buns :)

even though it would be another year before the tushie man visited again, the little dachshund felt it was best he stayed prepared. :) 

adventure awaits :)

the little dachshund skipped along the boardwalk bridge, his mom and dad trailing far behind him. “hurry, mom and dad! adventure awaits, and all we have to do find it, is to put one foot in front of the other!!” 

kalanchoe luciae

ooOOOoooOooooOoooOooo!

mom, is this one of those plants that make a stink flower every once in a zillion years? 

nosepiece

hee hee, um, well, because being as how i do not have a secret favorite rock pocket like otters do, sometimes it is the only way a wolf can carry things of great importance, really. :)

 

win win win

um, well, mom, what with it raining and all, how bout we just pretend i went for a walkie? and then we can just flip a coin -  heads i hold it, and we play how long, or tails i hide it, and we play go smell it. it is a win win win really. :) 

wrong turn

whoopsie, sorry, how did i get up here? please do not let me interrupt anything here. my apologies really. i musta taken that wrong turn at albuquerque.  so... so yeppies, lemme just make like a poopie snake and smear on outta here. don’t worry, i did not see a thing.  i’ll be out of your hair in no-

whoa, whoa! hey, i’m just a wolfie tryna - wait wait,  hey, okay no need to turn me around, i was just on my way out and -  o, well, smello, doctor tushie man and miss helper lady,  how did i not notice u before ? hey, like i said, i was just on my way to cucamonga, and i guess i took a wrong turn, so, like, no need to bring out a cake or anything i’ll just be on my way. yeppies it is totally my fault, i’m gonna need to maybe finally update the ios on my iphoney . hey do u guys have wifi? can i maybe, yeah maybe i can just go back to the house and get my usb cable and i’ll come back and i’ll bring gummy worms for everyone one. special reserve yeppies u really gotta try some they are so delicious and yeah they are just so —

 

wonderful. um, i know this is just my annual checkup and all but, can we just pretend we squeezed my charmin already? 

scenes from a nice walkie with my dad

...and that’s why walruses are much better candidates for space travel, really. o, hey, dad, dont ask me how i know, but do u know how many poops it takes to fill the back of our sofa?.. :)

bee a bee why

what?? mom, seriously. okay, okay, fine. u can call me your baby dog but just not in public. hee hee, now may i please have some? :)