etsy fresh: may your days be merry and boopable

Pssst - there are only ten weekends before Christmas.  Yeah, I know, really.  I just counted, and that doesn't seem very long at all, does it?  So it makes sense, I think, to let you in on another secret today.  Not a super top secret like tiny chumley's Halloween costume, and not really the kind of secret that you need to keep to yourself, so much as it is the kind of secret that you did not know.  Until now.  And you can tell anyone you want who might need the kind of holiday help only tiny chumley and his super cute paper goodies can provide.  Because they should know that in addition to all the super cool Christmas cards tiny chimley has in the Etsy shop, there is a new one that he just helped me add.  And not only does our new card have a super cute picture of you know who on the outside and on the inside, but it is also very very boopable.  So if you or someone you know would like to send a little boop this holiday season, be sure to clicky clicky here to see the full view of his latest Christmas card,  or clicky here for a look at all the tiny chumley holiday cards available this season. 

And stay tuned, because in addition to desk calendars which should make it to the shop next week, in the coming weeks tiny chumley and I will be finishing up this year's new doxie Christmas ornaments, as well as litters of tiny treasure boxes and etched and enameled necklaces, and a few other handmade surprises. Everything you'll need to make this Christmas a doxie wonderland of delights! :)

https://www.etsy.com/shop/kalyxcraftopia

heat cave for two :)

There are a few things yet to be completed on the heat cave I started to make for tiny chumley late last week, but try and tell that to a shivery little boy and his duk, on an ever so slightly chilly morning in autumn.  :) 

hee hee mom, we know it is not done yet but our new heat cave is still so very comfy and can you please turn george up to 80?  low breeze please. oh, and a hot cup of monkey chow cider would be nice too :)

etsy fresh: you are invited to our Top Secret Halloween Club :)

Hello my friends, it's me, Baxter, your roving rover reporter, reporting to you today about a very important invitation me and duk duk would like to make to you, to join our Top Secret Halloween Club.  Do you remember seeing some top secret things about our Halloween costumes every once in a while say on our Instagram or our Facebook or on Twitter or maybe even here?  Were you like, hey, when are we ever going to see the results ? Well, ever since our mom finished our Halloween costumes a few days ago, we have been really wanting to show you as much as you have wanted to see them. We even dressed up in our costumes and made Halloween cards that turned out super cool. But then we were like, hey,  Halloween isn't til Halloween and top secret is top secret, right?   But, if some of our friends like you really want to see our costumes early,  or say you need a really super cool Halloween card that will totally be like nothing you have ever seen before,  well, how can it happen and not spoil the surprise for everybuddy else?

Well my friends, that's how me and duk duk decided to form the Top Secret Halloween Club.  If you and your friend can keep a secret and want to send or get our super cool - but kind of SCARY!! - Halloween card now,  you can do so by clicking here, to get the card from my mom's kalyxcraftopia etsy shop.  Oh yeah, did I mention it was kind of scary?    

This is Baxter your roving rover reporter hoping you will join us in super cool halloweeny weenie top secrecy! :)

PS - this is not the actual card although the actual card is sort of on there but like, so pixelated and covered up that u know, it may as well not be the card. :) #topsecretSCARY

https://www.etsy.com/listing/207763820/baxter-duk-duks-top-secret-halloween?ref=shop_home_active_1

PPS (10/22/2014) Wow me and duk duk sold out! Please be patient my friends as we will be ordering more the next time mom places a print order so stay tuned! :)

bedtime moments

hmmmmmm..hmmmm...hee hee, well, dad, I bet everyone will be like..

eeeeEeeeeEEEEEEeeeEEEEeeek! 

yep, pretty sure that's how scary me and duk duk's halloween costumes are this year. :) #topsecretSCARY 

a simple request

mom, the next time you go out of town without me, please take me with you, okay? :)

yummy yummy :)

hee hee, what is the best thing I liked about staying in a hotel while I was at the beach? why, the yummy banana room service, of course! :) 

the beach is very windy

dear diary, 

unfortunately me and duk duk really really need to work on our essay before it gets any larger so I will make today's report about my visit to the beach short  and show u a supercool picture and some more videos of me at  the beach. I hope u enjoy them very much and I hope u have a very cool weekend. 

toodleydoo!

b :)

girls stand over there no matter where they are

Hello it's me, Baxter your roving reporter reporting to you again today from the beach, which I visited for the very first time with my mom and dad this past weekend. Today I am wearing my annoyed face, because nobuddy told me I was coming and nobuddy for sure told me that there would be dogs on the beach. Girl dogs in particular, that neither mind their own business or know where to stand. 

Here is the girl that came long after we set up on the beach. 

She kept getting me in trouble because she had one of those extendo leashes and I had to keep keep telling her where to stand.  But at least she was on a leash like she was supposed to be which is more than I can say for that big dog that nearly caused me to poop the entire contents of my esophagus, stomach, small and large intestine, alimentary canal, and colon too.  That big dog tried to run up to me and dad picked me up before I could send out the poop signal. Pretty sure he was brewing friendly but, well u just never know so better evacupooped than sorry. 

Anyhoo, going to the beach is very informative because it also reaffirmed my belief that in a world of Caladan fishes and dune sand worms, I would definitely be a sandworm. A sand worm knows better than to let the ocean touch your body  and that pretty much summed up my interest in those giant waves that could wash me and wash me away. I will take a paw wash any day over trying to wade in that big ocean and get lost, thank you. 

This is Baxter your roving rover reporter wishing you a very happy Wednesday! :)

meet me at the planetary intersection of Caladan and Dune

Hello my friends, it's me, Baxter, your roving rover reporter, interrupting me and duk duk's super cool poobery award winning monster short story series with a very special report this week on my trip this past weekend to the beach. Which I did not even know I was taking until I got out of mom and dad's car and I'm like, water and sand everywhere - did the space guild accidentally fold Caladan and Dune together?? 

Anyhow, this was my first visit to the beach and I will do my best to report to you all the highlights of my trip on my next two posts because today is Monday and not only do me and duk duk have a ninety page essay to write in the next ten minutes, but we also have to pack our lunchy lunches and figure out how to pull a hefty bag full of wet sand and seaweed to school, which will be especially hard since our pedal car does not have a hitch.  This is Baxter your roving rover reporter wishing you a very happy sandweenie Monday!! :)

today is stomping day, another nother short story by baxter and duk duk, in lieu of the ninety page essay on the pros and cons of a spiced based universe economy, that we were supposed to write for writing class

The monster feet had been in stinky situations before.  Children may smell like children, but their feet stink too, and especially in slipper shoes like him because they never seemed to want to wear socks and their feet get all sweaty and the only thing left to absorb all the sweat is, well, him.  He used to think their feet smelled awful, only now as he sat on the thrift store shelf, surrounded by scuffed patent mary janes and tired old sneakers that no longer lit up when you stomped with them, he missed smelling like what he now felt monster feet should always smell like.

Forever seemed to pass at the thrift store as he watched moms and dads take pair after pair of more practical shoes home for their stinky feet children, while he remained, alone and wondering if he would ever get to stomp again.  Tired being passed over time and time again, the monster feet decided to go into a deep deep sleep.

A curious and very sniffy wet nose startled him awake.  What the heck??? This is not the thrift store, he realized as the rest of his senses came into consciousness.  Why is there a tiny red cabin in front of me and what's that smell? It smells worse than children feet - more like, meat mixed with duk mixed with poop mixed with - hey, that tickles!

The brushing sensation of curious but very appreciative whiskers gave way to two stubby and chubby but extremely awesomely ferocious paws, each slipping in to him with a stink, awe, and reverence he had never felt before. Hmm, the monster feet thought. I am not in a house with stinky children feet and yet I no longer miss them.












One of his feet was lifted high into the air as the faint sound of snickers danced about his ears.  Wheeeee!! Today is a new day, he proclaimed as he started to fall and the wind started whooshing around him.  Today is stomping day! :)

the third sense, another short story by baxter and duk duk, as told from the perspective of the tiny red cabin in the woods, still in lieu of our thirty page essay on the pros and cons of a spice based universe economy, that were were supposed to write for writing class , only now it is sixty pages because of the story we turned in yesterday

The tiny red cabin in the woods was relieved that its inhabitants had decided to go in to town for the evening.  Restless people are not very relaxing, and nothing irked the cabin more than having people inside it who did not appreciate the solitude that it offered. Now that they were gone, the little cabin could relax and go back to its happy go lucky, cabiny ways.

 And yet, a strange sense of foreboding still haunted the cabin.  It had survived many rough winters in the woods, put up with noisy little children and snoring adults and even survived a freak rainshower of poopie snakes mixed with monkey chow.  But something about this foreboding feeling was different. A warm wind blew in from behind, bringing with it a piquant stink of curious and exceptionally malodorous quality and consistency, accompanied by a low, almost imperceptible gurgling noise. 


Hmmmmmmmm, the tiny red cabin in the woods thought, hmmmmmmmmmmmmm....

O bother, the little cabin decided. I see no need to worry about things I can only smell and hear and cannot see.  I have stood here for many years now. And I will stand for many more. :)

the tiny red cabin in the woods, a short story by baxter and duk duk, in lieu of a thirty page essay on the pros and cons of a spice based universe economy, that we were supposed to write for writing class

The ferocious monster paused to watch from a distance as smoke billowed from the chimney that sat atop the tiny red cabin in the woods. There would be plenty of time to stomp the cabin to the ground, the monster thought to himself as he settled down onto the cool soft mossy ground.  He stretched out in the open and let out a big yawn, no longer worried about being seen by the cabin's inhabitants as he had only minutes ago watched them drive off to town, probably in search of more video games to play or movies to watch because really what else interesting can you do in a tiny red cabin in the woods while you are waiting for your dinner to cook over a fire you made with sticks you collected because there was nothing else to do, especially since there were no video games to play or movies to watch .

Normally the ferocious monster would have stomped on the cabin by now, but he knew that if he waited long enough, dinner would be ready, and rabbit stew tasted delicious regardless of how stomped it had gotten. He sniffed at the smoke as it wafted in his direction.  Eleventy, no, three o'ninesies more minutes to go.

Monsters usually stomp alone. It's more fun that way to have the whole cabin or town yourself to stomp because then you can look back and see all that you did yourself, he thought.  But as his tummy started to growl, the ferocious monster realized that this stomping would have been a lot more fun if his he had invited his friend, Dukalodon, to join him.  Not to eat him, but so he could play with him.  And then maybe eat him. Or at least try to. After he stomped the cabin and ate the rabbit stew.  :)

(hee hee, i hope u enjoyed our story and yep mom got me a super cool new monster hat from Michaels, modified by mom for ear holes :) )

mission impoopable

okay Cassie, remember this was not my idea and I only agreed to do it because your dad cannot walk u on account your mom is away visiting your grandypops and your furless sister little miss Sarah still has a super bad case of poison ivy. so my dad is walking u while my mom walks me. only u have to stay over there and walk behind me because even though technically u are still a puppy, I can already tell the cooties are coming in and me no needy that, what with poopie con only two weeks away.   

oh, and one more thing. do NOT even try to herd me from back there, got me?  my swirlies will see if u get too close and I've got a p-eeeew locked and loaded and ready to stink u up, capoops? and hey hurry it up already because the faster we walk, the faster we will get to bunny meadow and already I am worried that we might not get there before they all go back in there burrows for their mid morning naps and then there will be nothing to chase and it will all be your stinky fault for not walking faster. okay, not that there should be any after all that, but, u got any questions? 

say what?? sheesh Cassie, your dad said u did it twice already before we came and got u. we can't just stop cuz u gotta..I mean, who even does that? all poops should be safely deposited in a pup's  own backyard to preserve shape and stink integrity. that's puppy 101!  I have never pooped on my walkie. every poopie is precious. your poopie snake collection must be a sham-

okay fine. u do what u need to do but u are no longer part of this mission. me and mom will wait with u until u r done and then move on to finish mission while u and dad go back home that way. just follow the bend in the trail and be sure to stay clear of the foofie trap I set over by that tree. I laid it pretty low to try and pay back that big dog that barked at us. but since it is not very windy today, I bet by the time u pass it, the stink will still assault your nose pretty good. anyway, like I said me and mom are gonna keep walking to bunny meadow cuz there should be at least one bunny to chase and I have not chased one in forev-

oh Cassie, right there by the side of the walkway? mom do not even try to take a picture. that's like, so uncouth- wait, phoo-wee! is that as big as I think it is? Cassie that is massive. I mean, that snake is like, as much as I make in a day. only, massiver. impressively massiver. museum quality massiver! oo thanks dad. how did u know I was going to ask if u could bag that up for...hey hey, where are you going? hey wait up for me, wontchoo guys? that bag's for me dad, yes? we are all going home now, right? yeah let's go home. u lead, Cassie, and I will follow u. :)

s is for snackie head

...eighteen, nineteen, twenty threeve, two hundred, fliventy-six, sixenty-twelve, three o ninesies...um, mom? r u still there? can i let go now?? :) :)

video cuteness: cash n carry

dear diary,
even though it is superfun for me and duk duk to take my pedal car and pedal to the pet store ourselves, sometimes i think it is also very nice to go to the pet store with mom and dad, mostly because when me and duk duk go, we eat all our gummy worms on the way over and by the time we get there, we can never afford anything. and when me and mom and dad go like we did the other day, they give me cash so i can buy a bag of snackies and then i carry it to the car all by myself.

anyhoo, i must go now so i can ask mom if she will make me a pair of cargo pants that i can wear to school that has extra extra big pockets. that way, well, let's just say some movies have the best ideas. toodleydoo! b. :)

mega movie tease monday: little gladiators

dear diary,
this past weekend i went to my puppy friend hank's house and something tells me once he settles down a little more on the chompy chomp, he and i will be very good friends.  how do i know? well, because he and i are already planning to make our first feature film together.  u know, something that will feature lots and lots of action and probably gladiators and lions and u know, stuff like that.

in fact, we went ahead and made a demo trailer.  it's a little rough and the trailer ends abruptly,  but as Poop T Barnum said, always leave them wanting more.  

toodleydoo!

b. :)

tiny video friday: always end on a soft note :)

dear diary,

a couple days ago i saw a video shared by hank's mom of a puppy learning to ding a ding bell and i thought, gee, puppies are such suckers. but then my mom saw it and next thing i know, i am taking piano lessons during my lunchy lunch training time.

my first lesson was actually pretty fun. not only are the snackies plentiful, but i am learning a thing or two. like, well, if u extend your toes it dampens the sound, and well, it is very soothing to end a song in a soft note. so i think i will try to always end on a soft note, at least for now because i guess i will be doing this for a while and if i think too much about how i might be missing out on lunchy lunch toyfriend club, i'll just get - well, u know. and besides maybe one day me and hank can play a duet together because i hear he is a fast learner.  anyhoo, one day, i hope i can play my whole song i wrote for u yesterday in one take, but for now i spliced together my song into a twenty second video and if u have twenty seconds to spare,  i hope u like it very much. especially the part where i end on a soft note.

toodleydoo!

b. :)

the short way round

hmmmm, ancient dachshund dog bowl dog puzzle, eh? try to get the snackies out of the incredibly tiny triangle hole, eh? 

hmmm...hmmmmm...

hee hee, well, u know what they say..
 
 where there is a will...






 

...there is a way around!! :)

 

 

partners in rhyme

I like sitting in my dad's lap 

because it is comfy and warm like a hot monkey chow drink 

and sometimes, 

when one of us makes a foofie stink,

we will point the finger of blame at each other,

and mom does not know what to think.

-baxter, 7.75 years old, enjoying time with his dad on a Saturday afternoon :) 

note to self: cherry tomato plants

There are several things I should try to remember when it comes to planning tiny chumley's cherry tomato garden next year.  Six plants are overkill. Four plants are plenty. Okay, five maybe, if I factor in bird and bunny theft. Christmas icicle tinsel, by the way, might have actually helped deter some birds this year so be sure to get a pack for a quarter when the thrift store holds their Christmas in July sale and drape them randomly on the cages.  Grape tomatoes are out, mostly because in all the years we have grown them, they never seem as tasty as the rounds. And through no fault of their own, yellow tomatoes are out, because I can never consistently pick them when they are ripe, nor do I have the gumption or interest in figuring that sort of thing out. Plus yellow tomatoes on a salad really don't look that great unless there are some red ones on there too. But I digress. 

The last and probably most important thing I should remember about tiny chumley and his tasty tiny tomato garden isn't really about the tomato plants, but about the window I thought was open just barely enough for sniffs and cuteness. And about a certain little determined doxie who happens to have a surprisingly stretchy extendo giraffe neck.

hee hee, mom are you trying to say remember to open the window wider next time because I am pretty sure I could eat even more tomatoes that way and that would be a win-win for both of us. and by us, I mean my tummy and me. just in case u were wondering. :) :)