the cassiceps strain

wait, cassie pooped here, in my backyard? when?!?!!?

wile e wolfote :)

i can too still help u make holes, mom. just let me and duk duk order some tnt and we can make all the holes u want. :)

sidecar silly :)

mom? mom! i know u cannot watch me on account of u driving and all but try to listen and figure out what sort of ferocious animal i am. ready? okay. 

rawwwwwwwwr! 

rawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwr!

rawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwr! 

okay u can have three guesses and if u guess wrong on all three of them we make a yooey and a wolf gets a pup cone and frenchy fries. :) 

later later :)

well, how about a snackie now, and a snackie later? and a snackie later later, too?  :) 

bridge over the slobber high

eek! cassie! i said stand still! 

just, please, do not move for three seconds so i can go tell dad something very important. uno…

dos… ew, slobber pile! …

…tres!  okay go on, cassie, u can go find some other place to slobber up now while i talk 2 dad about something very important. 

very, very important. like for ferocious wolf and wolf dad ears only. so, u know, feel free to go slobber up somewhere else. like, u know. my water bowl…again. 

hey dad, how bout we blow this poop stand just u n me and goto the candy store? i can pedal us and everything :)

bowled over :)

sheesh! cassie, this is only like the eleventyzillionth time i’ve had to tell you. look at all this slobber! not to mention all the cooties. now it is gonna take forever for me to decontaminate my water bowl and there goes me and duk duk’s plans tonitey nite to binge watch the last of us. not that we need to, what with our own homegrown apocalypse happening right before my very own eyes. seriously cassie, for the eleventyzillionth and one time, my water bowl is not communal. the “guest” water bowl is way over there. like, u know, where u should be. way over - 

 

hey wait, where u r going? o goody, maybe  a wolf’s rant finally worked and soon she will be miles

away. 

mom, can we not move her water bowl like, upstairs. or outside. or maybe, u know, over to her house? 

higher education:)

aw great. mom, is it too late for me and duk duk to goto college and live on campus? 

secret thumbs :)

“i do too have thumbs,” said the little dachshund to his best toyfriend, duk duk. “four really, or two pairs. one pair u can see just by looking at me and my ferocious paws from the front, and one pair hardly anybuddy sees. unless u r the grass i am peeing on.” 

tiny tomato plans :)

hee hee, beep beep! beep beep! ooo looky!

what do we have here? 

i see kale and i see thyme and i see coleus!  but where are all my - hmm one, two, pee, four, five - there are only six empty ones left. hmmmmmm.

mom, did u not get me and duk duk’s text with our garden plan this year? we are going to need at least eleventy zillion tiny tomato plants :) 

thunnier hwith thungue :)

hwell thure it hwould hwork, hmom. 

  

hthee? a bonathide porthrait hgood hfor hany denominathon currenthee or coinath. honly thunnier hwith thungue :) 

happy smellentine’s day :)

mom, what do u mean sell it more? a wolf is making the best face he can given the circumstances of this quote unquote, holiday. i mean, seriously why would anyone encourage all this kissy kissy stuff? everybuddy knows that’s how u get cooties. and the smelly flowers and the poison chocolate?  valentine’s day isn’t a holiday, it’s a dangerday. okay r we done here bc me and duk duk still need to put out the barbed wire and poopie traps in case u know who tries to come over and give us a u know what. 

goody goody fun drops :)

o goody! i was just stinking i mean thinking i have been a really good wolfie lately.  it is nice to finally be recognized for all a ferocious wolf’s conscious efforts to - wait…my surprisey prize isn’t a visit from cassie, is it? because that would really be a surprisey tax really. a big, panty mc pant pant, cootie filled tax. with poopies on top. and not the good kind of poopies. 

scentimental:)

o, well, it is only about this long.  but, u know, with all the rain we have been having, me and duk duk really need 2 save it. for, u know, scentimental reasons. so, yeppies, that is why we need 2 borrow some tongs. and a rubbermaid. until we get the leaks in the museum fixed. 

triangle head

um, no kissies on my ears please, mom. a wolf is in surveillance mode :) 

hiney hiney ho :)

the little dachshund realized that though he had always admired elephants with their long long snooty noses, he much preferred his long long tail, and his wonderful smelly smelly tooty noises. :) 

all quiet and smelly on the bedroom front

what was i doing in here by myself?  um, well, i was doing nothing any different than usual really….. so…… um…..well…. u might want to maybe open the windows and turn on the ceiling fan soon. :) 

this is the way :)

well, mom, a wolf is not begging really. because everybuddy knows the first popcorn bowl of the new year has 2 be shared with everyone, especially ferocious wolves. it is the only way to guarantee health and prosperity and well, u know, deliciousness. :) 

tiny winter tomato :)

the little dachshund spied the tiny tomato. hee hee, the little dachshund thought, even though it is winter and it is impossible for tiny tomatoes to grow outside, my mother thinks i think that this tiny tomato grew outside and that i would get exercise and have fun searching for it. and she is right. :) 

red blankie :)

well, i was stinking i mean thinking u could sew a secret snackie pocket on my new blankie here, on this tree, in the shape of a tree, so, u know, it is a secret. :) 

goodbye 2022 / smello 2023 :)

Wait, how many years has it been since tiny chumley and I started this blog? About fifteen, if my lazy math is right. A decade and a half.  

So much has happened in our lives, so much will happen. And I can’t even fathom what all that will be. But I know we can always meet here, in a world where a happy go lucky dachshund with a heart shaped tummy lives with his makey mom and dad, surrounded by his toyfriends, and wonderful friends like you. Happy new year! :)